It is no secret that having a child with a disability can be difficult and hard to deal with at times. I can only imagine what my parents thought process was when the doctors told them that there was a huge possibility that I may have cerebral palsy. I am sure they were scared shitless, nervous, and probably had no idea what the hell they were getting themselves into. With that being said though, they loved me and knew that they would do anything to help me live the most normal life possible.
There have been times though that people have not understood why my parents made the choice they did and not choose abortion or adoption. I remember a specific time where my mom ended up having a conversation with someone who we know about this. Now, before I continue on with my story, I just want to say that my intention is not to attack Pro Life or Pro Choice. If you believe one of those choices that is totally fine and I respect that. I also would like to add that I do not hold ill will against this person and believe that since this conversation has passed, they have changed and grown up since then.
From what I remember of the conversation it started by this person talking about how a friend was going to have tests done to make sure that their baby was healthy. They then proceeded to say that they would not be able to handle having a child with a disability and would then abort the baby if they had found out that the baby was not “normal”. My mom told them that she believed that every baby is a gift from God, no matter if there are differences or not.
This person then made it seem like my mom should have either had me aborted or given me up for adoption. To be completely honest, this pissed both my mom and I off really bad. It was also very hurtful. They made it seem like my mom and dad made a horrible choice by keeping me and attacked them on their parenting. And it made me feel like I was worthless and I did not deserve to be alive or be with my parents.
They also asked me if I was glad to be alive and be where I was even though I deal with my disability on a daily basis. My first thought was to be a complete bitch and come back with a smart ass remark, but I decided against that and took a deep breath (even though I was fuming on the inside), and told them that I may have struggles and that it may be hard some days, but I am glad to be alive and be with the family that I have. This question also really confused me and made no sense because I do not know a life without my cerebral palsy so how can I answer a question that I do not have the answer to?
I love the life I live and the life I have. Like I have said in the past, my parents have raised me to be independent and taught me how to live as much of a normal life as possible. If it was not for them, I would not be pursuing my dreams in Los Angeles and in the music industry. Because of what they taught me, nothing is off-limits. And because of that, I can strive to make a difference to change people’s mindsets that it would be too hard to raise a child with a disability.